Why is it so hard to get married in Nigeria? I bet that question has being running through the minds of a lot of females lately. Actually it’s not so hard, it’s not hard at all the problem is with our men. I ran into a friend few weeks ago at shoprite, his younger sister got engaged over the weekend and he was explaining how the whole event took place, then I asked him why his younger sister is married but he is still single,his reply shocked me, he said he wanted a lady that is focused, “Ahn ahn focused on what o” I asked, he said a woman must be focused on her career and must be a professional in her field. Trust me when I say that’s what every guy is saying now, it seems as if they are looking for a ready-made woman, graduate, good job, able to take care of her self, independent. But I ask you, if a woman has all that then what does she need a man for?
How can you openly say you want a woman that’s ready-made or a professional in her field? No man wants to be a house husband now, or do they? Am going to use my ex as an example, when we started dating he used to tell me all sorts of story about independent women and they help their husbands to be successful, at that time I didn’t see anything wrong in being a successful wife and supporting your husband. But when you start saying that if the wife is successful she must pay the bills that’s when you should know that something is wrong with you. So along the line, I began to notice those signs in him… Those ‘the lady should also be able to pay the bills’ and ‘you must get a job and make money before we get married’ signs, my brothers and sisters, that was the time I started to dust my slippers ready to run away. To top it all, he narrated a story about how a woman gave her husband a huge some of money to invest in a gold business,and now the husband is stinkinly rich all thanks to her. He said its also a woman’s job to pay bills and take care of her children’s fees. It’s not a problem if a woman pays her children’s fees but it’s the main job of a man.
A man will be quick to point out that he his the head of the family but this same man will ask the wife to take care of the children’s fees!!! No, it’s so wrong. When the Bible said the man is the head of the family and the woman must submit to her husband, it also meant that the man must provide for the whole family. So men, stop looking for an independent woman to make your wife, instead, marry her and make her independent -set up a small business for her, help her get a job, anything to keep her busy and get income. If a woman is focused on her job and not married, she will be too busy running her business, marriage might be a distraction to a professional lady. Nobody is ready-made, we all need people in our lives to help us climb the ladder of success.